ADHD – My Gift
ADHD for those who don’t know stands for Attention Deficit Hyperactive Disorder. A person who has ADHD is someone who struggles with focusing and being too hyper. That is the shortened version of it. Lots of us struggle with undiagnosed ADHD and a lot of our kids do too.
This is my story on ADHD. I grew up always feeling different. Different to my peers! Black sheep of my family! Just always felt like I didn’t belong. Felt like my ideas where different. Felt like at school I just couldn’t focus or understand subjects that didn’t interest me. Made so many silly errors in exams. Subjects that I loved I excelled at and was always the one with my hand up in class. I could never study from a book because it just bored me, so would always take notes as the teacher was talking and only studied from my notes and always did well in my exams. That was the only way I knew how to do things. I also would do my assignments as soon as they were given to me because I was scared to forget what was taught and was scared of missing the deadline. I still live like that. I do things as soon as they are given to me so that I don’t have to worry about them later.
When I grew up and got married and had my kids. I struggled a lot. The responsibility was overwhelming me and I struggled with anxiety and depression. I also struggled being a good mom. I didn’t know how to cope and would get emotional and angry at times. I would get distracted a lot. Would start with one thing and then go to another thing. I thought that was normal as that was all I knew. My husband at the time would get so frustrated. Tried to set routines but after a few days would lose interest. Tough times.
As the time passed and I had my first son and he was always hyper and defiant and very different from the other kids. One of my friends said to me “Monica your son he is different maybe see a psychologist to see if he can help him”. I was so upset that day. How can someone tell me my gorgeous son was different? I knew in my heart he was. So I went to see him. After tests the Dr said he had ADHD.
I started researching ADHD and started going to all the courses for my son so I could help him. The more research I did the more I realized that I had those symptoms and maybe I had adult ADHD that was never diagnosed. I went to see a Dr and he confirmed this. To be honest it was a relief to finally understand why I was the way I was. The thing is I did not take action then.
After my marriage fell apart and I struggled with my identity I realized that I needed to face all that was causing me unhappiness in my life. I realized that I had to get to the root cause of my ADHD. I did take medication for a while. It helped me for a while. The root cause was that I didn’t feel good enough in my life being me. I felt that I didn’t fit in. I was different.
The more work I did on building my life and growing as a person the more I realized that a lot of what I did achieve in my life was because of my ADHD. I am different and me being me is my gift and strength.
Things that I have learnt on this journey:
- We all have gifts and talents and we need to pursue them.
- People with ADHD or really anybody who never fit in will fit in somewhere when they find what they love and are passionate at. They will find their tribe.
- We may not fit into the box. Don’t try to put us there.
- Learn to love us for who we are and not for what you want us to be
- Our kids with ADHD are amazing. They are so talented. Look for what lights them up and hold their hand and help them get there. People like Justin Timberlake, Adam Levine, Richard Branson and Michael Phelpps all have ADHD. If their parents tried to put them in a box they would not be who they are today.
- Be proud of who you are. Don’t let anybody tell you you are not good enough. You were born the way you are to do what you are meant to in this world.
- My spontaneous ADHD character makes it easier for me to jump into new things and meet new people.
- Most entrepreneurs have ADHD
- ADHD people are usually the life of the party
- Let go of what people think and just love yourself and be proud of who you are.
- The more you work on yourself the more you will see a difference in your child. You are the example for your kids.
Enjoy the journey – It takes you to amazing places.
I am a spirituality life coach who works with amazing people and also works with parents to help them see the gifts in their kids because I followed my passions.
Are you following your passions? Are you letting others dictate your life or are you being you? Ask yourself those very important questions.